A man sat on a park bench feeding the pigeons.  After a few minutes two men walked past and sat on the next bench about 20 feet away.  The man kept his eyes on the pigeons in front of him and listened as the men talked.


Man 1: So what else is going on?

Man 2: Well like the holidays you mean?

Man 1: No, well maybe that too, you have some negative associations there too.

Man 2: Do not!

Man 1: Do too!  And you have only gotten worse.

Man 2: That was Harsh.

Man 1: You sometimes need it harsh. (Gives a look of knowing that obviously refers to something else.)

Man 2: (Rolls eyes and makes an ugly face) Are we really going back to that?  Really, that?  Are we still on that?

Man 1: Well it still comes up.

Man 2: Why?

Man 1: I don't know but surely you do.  You have had long enough to think about it.

Man 2: I guess deep down I really want it to keep coming up.

Man 1: Why do you suppose that is?

Man 2: It is the place I always return to.

Man 1: That is in your mind.  There is nothing in this experience that cannot be re-programmed.  You have done it before.  In fact, now you are even aware of how to install the replacements.  You have already taken the first steps.

Man 2: First steps (sigh), What is it about first steps?  The word first implies that there are many more to follow (deeper sigh).  Also walking away and letting something else go.  

Man 1: But you only feel badly about that when you put it into those negative terms.  That is when you are focusing on all of those things that you will need to do.  Rather than being joyous that there is always an adventure to be lived.  You stop yourself short of living in the adventure today because you decide that the future will be exhausting.  

Man 2: Doesn't it seem like it will be exhausting?

Man 1: You will never run out of energy to chase your passion.  What about doing what you love is exhausting?

Man 2: There is just so much to do.

Man 1: That is an illusion.

Man 2: It is?

Man 1: Yes. You can only do the next thing that needs doing.  You are too busy worrying about how you will afford the roofing tiles when you should be carrying the bricks to lay the foundation.

Man 2: Right, and then I get frustrated or overwhelmed and go hide.  I avoid doing anything because there is so much to do.  I use sleep to avoid the challenges that I need to overcome in order to grow.

Man 1: Ah ha!  So do you realize that you need the challenges to grow?

Man 2: Need the challenges?  

Man 1: Have you some other way to measure your progress?  Challenges are a tool to measure your maturity level.

Man 2: Are you saying that I am immature because I don't embrace the challenges?

Man 1: That depends on the reason for putting off the challenges.

Man 2: I wish that I could say that I was trying to get every last ounce of joy out of life.  The truth is, I avoid those joyful situations as much as the potential challenges.  

Man 1: I can understand trying to avoid pain but Why would you avoid joy?

Man 2: What if I get the joy and then lose it?

Man 1: So you are worried about losing something that your current way of thinking has you avoiding at all costs.  

Man 2: I see what you mean.  That's about 100% ridiculous and maybe a little immature.

Man 1: You need a plan.  Then you need to focus on the simple tasks that you can complete or start on now. Forget the roof tiles and carry the bricks.  

Man 2: Back to the foundation. (sigh)

Man 1: Why do you do that?  Why not recognize that you have made progress?  Why not celebrate the victories that you have had?  

Man 2: But look at me, I am not there.  The progress hasn't been enough.  It is never done.

Man 1: Get that idea out of your mind.  You will never be "done".  Live!  Enjoy moving closer to your goals every day.  Each completed task adds another piece to the puzzle, unlocks another door and more importantly changes your final destination.

Man 2: I think we had better get going.  I have a few things I want to do today.

Man 1: Like What?

Man 2: I just need to carry a few bricks and start living.

Man 1: Call me when you are done with those bricks and we can celebrate together.  I know a guy with a bunch of left-over roofing tiles he is trying to get rid of.

This morning, when she first woke, I got to spend some time with my daughter. 

It was just the two of us, no interruptions, nowhere else to be and nothing else to do.  I wasn't long in terms of time, perhaps we spend as much time everyday, getting ready for school, having breakfast and walking her to the bus stop.  Lately though, it feels like something has been missing and our connection has been weak.  In the absence of a schedule and an agenda, we got to talk about stuff.  What she likes, what she wants for Christmas, what her friends have, say and do.  I got to see her happiness in preparing for Christmas and the joy she got from imagining her day.  We sat outside in the cold on the front porch for a few minutes.  Somehow the cold of the snowy morning transformed the few minutes into an eternity within the moment.  I sat on the cold sandstone step and she sat on my lap.  Her barefeet in the morning chill and our breath visible in the crisp air.  I suggested a game and she accepted my challenge to see if we could sit out there until the 5th car passed on our street. We snuggled and fidgeted as we anticipated, celebrated and counted the cars.  After we had reached 5 we paused, looked at each other and then hurried back inside.  Sometimes the most ordinary moments can be profound if you let them.